dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
