i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
