Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
