went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
