Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
