Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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