none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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