We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
