Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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