is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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