its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
