The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
When are your genitals available?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
