I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
