She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Randomize