it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
