Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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