everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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