Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
