Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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