Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
