you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
