Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
its liver damage thursday
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