i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I pour the whiskey from now on
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
