He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
