i just google imaged poop.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
