Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize