Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
