are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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