So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
