fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
