Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
