do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
