I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize