o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
