You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
