Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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