Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
This couple is walking their pig around campus
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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