Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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