i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
