East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
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