she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
