so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
