We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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