There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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