It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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