so that wasnt chicken after all
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
