she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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