Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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