oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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