How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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